Just had a call about a guy complaining that his employer didn't give him his Record of Employment. We're at labour standards, not the Employment Insurance office, and that's none of our business. We can't do anything about that, it not in our law, you have to call the EI.

And the guy goes: "Well, you really don't want to do your job, do you?" and hangs up on me.

AARRGGHH!!

I told it to my coworker, and one of them recounted an information session they've had with a management consultant of some kind, who said that IF YOU DID YOUR JOB RIGHT, SUCH THINGS WOULDN'T HAPPEN. I was outraged!

What does that mean? that it's MY fault, that an asshole calls? That if some fucktard doesn't want to understand, it's MY fault? Hey, I'm all for responsibilities, but that's too much! I wish I'd been there.

Imaginary conversation with the consultant:
Consultant: If you did your job right, such things won't happen.
Me: WHAT!? Does it mean that if someone yells at me, it means that I haven't done my job right?
Consultant: yes.
ME: it means that if someone is an asshole, it's MY FAULT?
Consultan: Why, yes.
ME: WHAT KIND OF FUCKING LOGIC IS THIS!? ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME THAT IT'S MY FAULT THAT A DUMBASS CALLS, AND GETS ANGRY, WHEN I'VE GIVEN THEM A PERFECTLY RESPECTABLE ANSWER, AND THAT I SHOULD FEEL GUILTY ABOUT IT!?
Consultant: Please calm down...
ME: WELL, IF YOU DID YOUR JOB RIGHT, SUCH THINGS WOULDN'T HAPPEN!!!

Or something to the effect. Throw a fit or something. Just to get that last line in.

Featured today

... in the too much information department: medical information.

Look people. Medical info is private. Sometimes, for a good reason. You have the right to keep medical information private, so please, exercise that right. Especially when said medical condition is totally irrelevant to the discussion and, moreover, is an especially embarassing one.

Because, you know, there really is no pride in admitting that you went water-skiing, fell on your butt, which caused tearing in a very sensitive and unattractive body part. Please keep it for yourself. It's not because we're on the phone that people won't be laughing at you for quite a while.

The first thing I heard on the radio when I woke up this morning was the news about the dude in the US who said that 99% of the people who have autism were in fact just ill-behaved kids. The newsguy was telling us that people and groups were demanding the dude's head on a platter, for having dared to utter such atrocity.

And in the same breath, newsguy goes on talking about Mike Ward, who got death threats because he had the misfortune to make a joke with Cedrika Provencher, the girl who went missing. The joke was quoted in a newspaper, and since then, Ward can't even go out of his house because he's got death threaths.

Newsguy then said something about putting things in context.

And all I could do was marvel at the irony of the thing. i mean, on one side you've got the dude with the autistic kids, and it's alright to ask for HIS head, but then you can turn around and complain about how people don't put sayings in context and should just basically calm down.

IRONY!!!

I was going to work this morning, and the lady in front of me in the escalator was wearing a pair of white pants. She had what appeared to be a spot of humidity in the groin area. Pretty had to miss, since her ass was in my face. I know she knew, because she was rubbing her ass all the time.

For a split second, I felt the urge to go up to her and say "Yep, it shows."
But no.

I guess Schadenfreude is a sense I have yet to perfect...

What would you tell an employer who tells you to go attend one of those new-age seminars on "personal growth"? This employer was into I don't know what, really believed in this crap, something about leaving the past in the past and that kind of shit, and now he's making all, I repeat, ALL his employees attend it, otherwise, goodbye.

It's like forcing your employees to join a cult. Geez, some people are nuts!

Oh, and I just got yelled at again by a customer on the phone, because he didn't want to wait a few weeks for us to process his complaint. And something about us fuckers who work for the government, who never do anything, etc.

One gets all sort of people when working in a call center, and some people give you 7 kinds of crap. This dude the other day INSISTED that we help him. The only problem was, that we couldn't. And he didn't take that. Started bitching about how incompetent I was. "You a damn secretary? Do you know the law?" Well, I friggin hope so , after a month's training. "There anyone more competent?" Fine. Dumped the call on a supervisor. Poor guy had to deal with the dude, and at some point,
"Well, Sir, what do you want exactly?"
"I'm starting to think that what I want is to blow up all the offices that piss me off!"

o.O Oh great. I have to admit, I glanced at the caller ID to see where he was calling from. 814. Phew!

And today, this lady calls and starts bitching because she got fired for having made a coworker cry. The coworker happened to be Chinese. I happen to be Chinese. For 45 minutes, I had to listen to her go "just because that Chinese girl was crying". At some point, I was thinking I'd just say to her, at the end of the call "BTW, I'm Chinese." and hang up. And then she asks for my name.

And I thought, God exists.
Awkward silence. Then: "Don't tell me you're Chinese... "
"Hem. Yeah. "

WELL. I guess SOMEONE's going to kick themselves tonight.